Im Dr. Urlaa and Im my litters breeder.
I'm also your worst nightmare if you havent been living your life the way I think you should. It really cheeses me off when you people do stuff like living in sin, or how some of you deliberately choose to live a homosexual lifestyle when you know darned well you could just as well be having a heterosexual relationship that wouldn't disgust me.
Dont try to tell me that Id be enough to turn any man gay. Ive heard that way too many times from all my ex-boyfriends to fall for it. Face it! If you're not like me youre just a worthless lump of rat droppings. Ill try to work with you, but listen up: if you give me any lip, or if you try to correct me while Im making a moral judgement of you, Ill humiliate you even more than youve already humiliated yourself by asking me for advice.
Sure, I made mistakes when I was young, but thats not going to stop me from judging you with a vengence!
If you dont have a clue about whats morally right or wrong, and youd like for some narrow-minded, bigoted, talk show host to tell you what's right or wrong, email me at email@example.com. Just spill your guts and bare your soul. Ill have my computer send you an automated response thats as compassionate and concerned as youll get on some nationally broadcast talk shows. If youre lucky (or pathetic enough), Ill even consider putting you on my Ratty Advice Talk Show Web Page.
Now go take the day by the throat, slap it around, and treat it like doodoo. If you have friends, relatives, or co-workers who dont share my personal philosophy, tell them politely that you dont care to associate with immoral slugs.
I'm Dr. Urlaa. Go do the Rat thing! I know I will.